There are all kinds of ways of looking at “things”.
Let’s consider infertility a “thing”.
Do you look at it straight on, no glancing to the left or the right? Almost with blinders on, eye on the goal?
I like to call it the "take no prisoners" approach.
It can be mighty effective. There are lots of metaphors that would fit here. A steamroller, squashing anything in it's path, dispassionately and without malice, just unrelentingly persistent.
How about that? Unrelentingly persistent?
I think I was that, in my own special way, while I was in treatment. Unrelentingly persistent. Although I took breaks from fertility treatment, they were just that– breaks. I considered it down time and as relaxed as I was able to be during those months, there was always awareness that it was rest time before another period of effort.
My life was still structured around getting and staying pregnant, having a baby.
Unrelentingly persistent were two of the kinder words that I would choose for myself while I was in treatment and bombarded with difficult decisions, uncomfortable protocols, and frustrating disappointments and outcomes.
How Would You Describe Yourself While In Fertility Treatment?
Consider what two or three words you would choose to describe yourself in your pursuit of your family.
And if crazy and obsessed are the first two that come to mind, dig a little deeper.
I’ll do some of the work for you. Here are some of the synonyms for crazy: wild, passionate, fanatical, extreme, foolish, unwise. Passionate? Love that one. Extreme, well, yes, probably. And why not? Pick one of those and replace crazy. New choices are passionate, extreme or even fanatical. (One synonym for fanatical– dedicated. Don’t you love that one? Why not go with dedicated?)
Synonyms for obsessed– preoccupied, possessed, infatuated, fixated, passionate. Notice how passionate keeps coming up? Also notice how those words are so much less negatively charged than obsessed? We rarely use the word obsessed as a positive attribute, it’s usually used with a heavy judgment towards it.
Unrelentingly persistent is how I describe myself while I was in fertility treatment. Synonyms for unrelentingly– inexorably, remorselessly, insistently, indefatigably, mercilessly. You know what? They all fit. Persistent synonyms– unrelentingly, pushy, importunate, determined, relentless. Well. They all fit too.
Could you share your words? And if they are nasty or demeaning, like crazy and obsessive, look up the synonyms. Passionate instead of crazy. Fixated instead of obsessive. They still work, they just fit better. They feel better.
What two words describe you in your path to fertility?