October is known to most for the well-deserved recognition of and awareness for Breast Cancer. But for those of us focused on matters of fertility, October is also important as it is Pregnancy & Infant Loss Awareness month and October 15 the specific day of remembrance.Designated as an official day of remembrance in 1988 by Ronald Reagan, governors in all 50 states signed a proclamation to recognize the official day.
Since one in four women experience a miscarriage, this month of remembrance has personal meaning for many of us. But since it is so little understood, those of us who have experienced this devastating loss often don't find the right support when we need it. We DO know, however, that despite the brevity of our babies’ lives, the loss can be the most painful thing ever experienced by a human being.
The History of Pregnancy & Infant Loss Remembrance DayRobyn Bear and Lisa Brown, Founder and Co-Founder of www.october15th.com, vigorously support the awareness of these important losses. On their website they share the history of Pregnancy and Infant Loss Remembrance Day.
“Robyn Bear, founder of www.pain-heartache-hope.com envisioned a day when all grieving parents could come together and be surrounded by love and support from their friends and families, a day wh
ere the community could better understand their pain and learn how to reach out to those grieving. This would be a day to reflect on the loss yet embrace the love. While our babies’ lives where so brief, they were also very meaningful. Yet, there was not a time to talk about them. Our society seemed to forget or perhaps, simply didn't know how to reach out. Since October had been proclaimed "Awareness Month", she chose a day, in the middle of the month to become, "Pregnancy and Infant Loss Remembrance Day".”
On October 4, 2001, the House of Representatives unanimously passed support for the goals of Pregnancy and Infant Loss Remembrance Day. Listen to the remarkable video showing the House of Representatives discussing House Resolution #222. The commitment to and understanding of infant and pregnancy losses is a testament to our heart break.
RMACT Honors Pregnancy & Infant Loss Awareness Day
This Sunday, October 15, 2015, Reproductive Medicine Associates of Connecticut (RMACT) will host a book club event to honor Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness Day and month. We will discuss “Not Broken: An Approachable Guide to Miscarriage and Recurrent Pregnancy Loss” on GoodReads, joined by the author, by Lora Shahine, MD, who will answer questions and participate in the conversation.
We know firsthand that not every pregnancy comes along easily and that not every pregnancy progresses. We also know that every pregnancy loss is heartbreaking and that needing medical treatment to become pregnant adds another layer of desperation and chaos. And we know that a loss at any point, even an unsuccessful fertility treatment cycle, is heart breaking.
A well-known quote by Ella Wheeler Wilcox from her best-known work Poems of Passion, specifically "Solitude", contains this line, "Laugh, and the world laughs with you; weep, and you weep alone."
Our message is radically different.
We will laugh with you.
We will weep with you.
You are not alone...even when that is how you feel.
We honor your losses and remember them with you.