Is Infertility a Medical Problem?
This is not a politically correct blog. I’m giving fair warning. It’s not nice. It’s not tolerant. It’s not a lot of things. So if you’re not in the mood to hear the inner workings of my brain, press delete and come back tomorrow.
And, I’m asking you a question. So if you do read this blog regularly or just popped in for the first time, I’d like an answer when you’re done.
Some things just make me a little crazy. Or really, very, very crazy.
Certain questions about infertility can do it quite easily.
I’ve been told and have read that there are no stupid questions.
I don’t agree.
Especially when the question is asked with the answer firmly in mind and the person is not at all open to any other answer.
And maybe that’s not stupid. Maybe that’s just a commitment to one’s point of view. Or an excuse to pontificate on what that person believes. Or maybe it’s a dedication to ignorance as well.
I was asked this weekend why I considered infertility a medical problem, given all the real medical problems that exist out there, that people are truly suffering from.
My first reaction? My jaw dropped open and I stared at the person.
What went on in my head was something like this . . . ”Are you kidding me? Have you ever read a newspaper or anything on the internet? Please don’t make me have to have a conversation with this moron, how far do I have to go in this conversation, what’s the best possible response? How is it possible that in 2013 I am being asked this question? I wonder if this person even LIKES their own children?” and on and on. It probably was only about a thirty second pause but you know how long thirty seconds can be when you’re not having fun.
What to do?
Causes of Infertility and Facing Ignorance
List all the causes of infertility, all the medical conditions that contribute?
PCOS, endometriosis, pre-mature ovarian failure, sperm morphology, blocked tubes, unbalanced hormonal levels, genetic diseases, unexplained reasons for inability to conceive, repeated miscarriages. And so on and so on.
I’ve been in the trenches of infertility for a quarter of a century. Twenty-five years. As a patient, as a patient advocate and educator, as an editor of a magazine devoted to understanding infertility, as a liaison between reproductive endocrinologists and gynecologists, as a writer, a peer support group leader and more.
There were many ways I could have answered this question. Many hats I could have balanced on my head to wear, answering this question.
I have a question for you.
What would you have liked for me to say?
Consider this a call to action. I would like to know what you would have liked me to have said. Maybe what you would have said or maybe what you would say if you felt more free to say anything that you want.
If you could script an answer to this question.
What would it be?
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