Finding the Fertile Self

Finding the Fertile Self

I am a lucky woman.

 

I know that.

 

Last night, I taught a yoga class and offered the intention that the time spent in practice could be treated as a break from the rest of the day. A vacation. Time just for yourself.

 

I just went on vacation.

 

I pretty much did what I wanted and didn’t do what I didn’t want.

 

Two of the gorgeous women in class last night practiced most of the time with their eyes closed. And big smiles on their face. You could see their inner light, shining through. Their sunshine, generated by their own generous hearts.

 

They took to heart the idea of enjoying their practice. Of making that the point of their practice. And their breath expanded their hearts, which expanded their practice even more.

 

That’s yoga. Not a bunch of physical poses. Coming into our own hearts and breath. Finding our inner smile and then shining it out.

A Screenching Halt: Infertility

Infertility can put a screeching halt to expanding. It can cause you to contract and constrict and isolate. It can cause you to become smaller and smaller and smaller until you basically can’t even recognize yourself.

 

How many times have we heard from partners that they don’t recognize themselves anymore, much less each other? That the person they are, with their beloved, no longer resembles who they fell in love with, who they created a life with, and in the same breath, neither do they recognize themselves.

 

Most of the changes we see in ourselves and others are “negative”. We are more angry, more sad, more anxious, more frustrated, more jealous. More, more, more.

 

We are more emotional. More hopeful. More vulnerable.

 

And here we come to the crux of it.

 

Emerging from Infertility and Vulnerability

 

We are more vulnerable.

 

With infertility, there is not a lot to hide behind. We can’t sort of create a family. There is either a child added to our family or there is not. And we are vulnerable in our desire. We are hurt, easily, by insensitive, even if well meant, comments.

 

And so we become smaller.

 

Know a great way to stop the incredible shrinking process?

 

Talking.

 

Sharing.

 

Acknowledging the pain.

 

And finding ourselves and each other, underneath it all.

 

Do it.

 

Challenge yourself.

 

Write a response. Come to Ladies Night In, our peer support group. Offer to write a guest blog. Come to the March of Dimes' Walk for Babies. The Pre-conception wellness seminar.

 

Assume you will come out of this, whole and complete.

 

While you may have seismic shifts, you will emerge whole and complete.

 

We are here to help you do that. Doing it alone is completely and utterly unnecessary.

 

Let us know what we can do to help. 

 

Lisa Rosenthal's Google+

 

 

Topics: Support, Yoga

Lisa Rosenthal

Lisa has over thirty years of experience in the fertility field. After her personal infertility journey, she felt dissatisfied with the lack of comprehensive services available to support her. She was determined to help others undergoing fertility treatment. Lisa has been with RMACT for eleven years and serves as Patient Advocate and the Strategic Content Lead.

Lisa is the teacher and founder of Fertile Yoga, a program designed to support men and women on their quest for their families through gentle movement and meditation.

Lisa’s true passion is supporting patients getting into treatment, being able to stay in treatment and staying whole and complete throughout the process. Lisa is also a Certified Grief Recovery Specialist, which is helpful in her work with fertility patients.

Her experience also includes working with RESOLVE: The National Infertility Association and The American Fertility Association (now Path2Parenthood), where she was Educational Coordinator, Conference Director and Assistant Executive Director.

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