"What's wrong with me?"
That was the question of the evening last night at Ladies Night In, in Danbury.
We ask that question of ourselves because of infertility.
The question came up if we would ask that question of ourselves for any other physical, medical problem. We thought probably not.
I have a thyroid problem. Ok, I have thyroid disease. Only none of us like having a disease, do we? So, I have thyroid disease. I have to take medication, I have to go and get ultrasounds on a regular basis. I have to be aware of changes in how I feel, new symptoms cropping up.
I don't blame myself.
I see my body as an extremely delicate, yet strong, series of mechanisms that need to work, mainly right. Our bodies are more than that though. We are all tremendously unique, idiosancratic beings.
If you think I may be exaggerating, consider a basic sense of taste. Why does one person love cilantro (me) and another person despiese it? Why is dairy a problem for so many and not at all a problem for others? I could go on and on. Our sense of taste is as varied as there are people in the history of the world.
Our sense of taste is a physical manifestation, bringing together nature and nurture. We love the taste of some things because they remind us of childhood, of comfort. We also can dislike some tastes because we never liked them in the first place and had to eat them anyway because they were good for us.
Two people can put identical foods into their mouths and have tremendously different reactions. One loves it, one hates it.
We are all tremendously unique, idiosyncratic beings.
And so some of us get thyroid disease. Some of us experience asthma. Some of us have intense food allergies. Some of us have irritable bowel. Some of us have cancer. Some of us have cardiac problems.
All of us have something that isn't quite right. And if you don't yet, you will. It's the nature of these physical vehicles in which we get to use to move around the earth.
So why do we blame ourselves for our infertility problems when we rarely blame ourselves for other problems?
Why do we ask "what's wrong with me?" with infertility?
Why does it strike so much closer to the heart? What does infertility bring up that these other physical problems do not?
I have my ideas on the subject, but I am just one person. There are probably many answers out there that I would never ever think of.
Please write in and share your thoughts and answers. I will follow up on this subject next week, on Thursday and include your thoughts and answers. Anonymously, of course.
"What's wrong with me?"
Your answers or thoughts?